30-day Fitness Challenge: Day 10

I'm shaking, wth. :))

I'm starting to feel the burn, especially on my abs. Although I don't notice the change, some people have started calling me sexy again. Or maybe because we just got paid so everyone is in a good mood. Haha.

Here's day 10:

Plank Challenge:
60sec plank

Ab Challenge:
50 Sit Ups
50 Crunches (this is becoming my favorite)
30 Leg Raises (and i still hate this)
38 sec Plank

Squat Challenge:
105 Squats

Arm Challenge:
22 Push Ups
60 Bicep Curls
45sec Punches

And after day 10 of doing the challenge plus limiting my calorie intake to 1200 (sometimes without success lol), here are my measurements in inches:

Biceps - 12 (no change)
Legs - 22.5 (-1.5)
Hips - 39 (-1)
Waist - 29 (-1)

Hey, at least it's something.

30 Day Fitness Challenge: Day 9

I didn't do the challenge over the weekend because I had a really late gig last saturday and got sick the following day. God, I'm getting old.

Too early for a progress picture but I'll show you anyway.




My face is getting thinner. I hate it when that happens, but my face is usually the first one to get thin.

I am already 4 days behind on the challenge so I kinda struggled with some of the exercises.

Plank Challenge:
60sec plank

Ab Challenge:
45 Sit Ups
30 Crunches
30 Leg Raises
45 sec Plank

Squat Challenge:
100 Squats (holy crud)

Arm Challenge:
40 Push Ups (I didn't do the chair dips again so I compensated with double the push ups)
55 Bicep Curls (without weights. I'm not doing this again, I didn't feel any strain)
40sec Punches

My officemate brought cake and pizza for his birthday, and I tried to escape so I don't need to eat, but I wasn't able to. :( But it was good! I didn't eat anything for dinner anyway so I guess that pretty much compensates for all the calories I consumed.

On another note, I've been feeling a bit down lately. Everytime I look at myself in the mirror and on pictures, I want to cry. I feel so fat and frumpy. :( I wish this would work out.

30-Day Fitness Challenge: Day 8

I was so stressed at work today that I ate everything on my "Do Not Consume" List:  Coke, Rice, Chocolate, Chips, and Milk Tea. All on the same day.@_@

Rest day today, except for planking. I want to do more but I guess I have to stick to the challenge.

Plank Challenge:
45sec plank

Ab Challenge:
REST

Squat Challenge:
REST

Arm Challenge:
REST

30-Day Fitness Challenge: Day 6 and 7

I stopped for three days because I was too tired to exercise, which is bad, I know. But I'm back, baby!

First, lemme take a se--- uh, here's a progress picture.

I don't see much improvement (probably because I ate a lot of rice last weekend, haha) but I definitely feel stronger. I can do 30 squats easy now. I still don't like them though. And mirror's still dirty. Sorry.

I forgot to blog about day 6 (May 3) so here's what I did:

Plank Challenge:
REST

Ab Challenge:
35 Sit Ups
15 Crunches
15 Leg Raises
25 sec Plank

Squat Challenge:
75 Squats

Arm Challenge:
15 Push Ups
20 Chair Dips
40 Bicep Curls
30sec Punches

Here's what I did today, day 7:

Plank Challenge:
45sec Plank

Ab Challenge:
40 Sit Ups
20 Crunches
20 Leg Raises
30 sec Plank

Squat Challenge:
80 Squats (Cleared 30 squats easy, this is getting tolerable day by day)

Arm Challenge:
18 Push Ups
50 Bicep Curls
35sec Punches
(I didn't do the chair dip as I have no chair to utilize, I'll find an alternative for this soon)

30-Day Fitness Challenge: Day 5

It's Kusabi's day off so I have a spotter!

Plank Challenge:
40sec plank

Ab Challenge:
30 Sit ups
12 Crunches
12 Leg Raises
20sec plank

Squat Challenge:
70 Squats

Arm Challenge:
20 Push Ups 
15 Bench Dips
30 Bicep Curls
30sec Punches

Going home to Laguna in a few minutes and will be staying there til Monday! Yey!

30-Day Fitness Challenge: Day 4

Late post 
Day 4

Plank Challenge:
30sec Plank
Extra (did an additional 20sec plank because I can lolol)

Ab Challenge:
REST

Squat Challenge:
REST

Arm Challenge:
REST


I mentioned that I took a time off after Day 2. I didnt know there were rests incorporated in the 30 days. Haha. 

30-Day Fitness Challenge: Day 3

Yesterday's my rest day. I wanted to do it everyday but Kusabi told me I need to have rest days because I need to give my muscle time to recover.

He then bought me Chickenjoy with spaghetti, mashed potatoes and a large Sprite. Very supportive, eh. :))

So here's day three.

Plank Challenge:
30sec Plank

Ab Challenge:
25 Sit Ups
10 Crunches
10 Leg Raises
15sec Plank

Squat Challenge:
60 Squats (Holy hell...)

Arm Challenge:
10 Push Ups (which, by the way, I'm not sure if I'm doing correctly)
10 Bench Dips
20 Bicep Curls
20sec Punches

And since I got curious, I took a peek at Day 30. 300 second plank, dafuq. I really don't wanna see how many squats I need to do on Day 30. *flails*

Maybe I'd just go up to day 15 then maintain that. We will see.

PS: I think I'm addicted to Skyflakes now.

30-day Fitness Challenge: Day 2

Plank Challenge:
20sec Plank

Ab Challenge:
20 Sit ups
8 Crunches
8 Leg Raises
12sec Plank

Squats Challenge: (my favorite *rolls eyes*)
55 Squats, ready to die at 30

Arm Challenge:
8 Push Ups
8 Bench Dips
15 Bicep Curls
15sec Punches

I'm beginning to see why these are called challenges. I want to die. Hahaha. Did I mention I love the squats? Huh? Huh?

It's embarrassing to look at myself in the mirror. I wish this would work.

30 Day Fitness Challenge: Day 1

After that disastrous attempt to get off Facebook for 30 days (but hey, I managed to last a week, give me some credit haha), I've decided to take on a different challenge altogether.

That dirty mirror tho. (makes punas)

I looked at myself in the mirror recently and I was stunned at how I managed to let myself go for the past few months. It's fucking depressing, I know. But instead of wallowing in misery, I decided to take action instead.



So, tadah! The 30-day Fitness Challenge!


For now, I'll be doing four challenges: Ab Challenge, Arm Challenge (which I totally need), Squat Challenge (ditto), and the Planking Challenge. Gulp. Just finished doing day 1 and I am KNACKERED. Well, probably because I don't really exercise so I'm guessing I'm going to struggle a bit.

So here's what I did for Day 1

(I cant find my tape measure so I'll update you guys tomorrow)

Planking Challenge:
20s Plank

Ab Challenge:
15 Sit Ups
5 Crunches
5 Leg Raise
10s Plank

Squat Challenge: 
50 Squats (this almost killed me, I'm not even kidding)

Arm Challenge:
5 Push Ups
5 Bench Dips
10 Bicep Curls (with weights)
10s Punches


I hope I'm able to finish this challenge. XD And It's going to be tougher. Those squats will kill me. And let's not talk about the plank, it's torture. :))

The 30 Day No-FacebookChallenge: Failed.

Yeah. I know. I suck. :))

If there's anything I missed about Facebook, it's the constant communication I have with my friends. I have Viber, yes, but it's not the same.I've also learned not to talk about serious issues on Facebook (I just had an argument with someone within five minutes of activating, ugh.)

So, from now on, I'll be on Facebook, but not really.

Maybe I should do the 30 day no water challenge instead or something, that's tolerable :|

The 30-day No Facebook Challenge: Day 7

My boss asked me if I still get enough sleep, because I'm still posting pictures on Instagram at 6 in the morning. Yikes.

It's really nice to come home to a clean house. Kusabi rearranged the apartment so it looks spacier and cleaner now. Although the bed and the laptop are now at opposite sides of the room.

Hungry talk: I want to cook carbonara again! With butter and bacon this time. Kusabi commented that I can do anything if I just put my mind into it. I said, maybe it's my ultimate calling to be a world renowned chef! "I..wouldn't really go that far.." he answered. Pfft. :))

One whole frickin week of no Facebook. I feel like I'm a total hobo now.


If you guys wanna talk to me, I'm on Skype most of the time, so add me up and feel free to stare at my awesome display picture.

The 30-Day No Facebook Challenge: Day 6

Midnight Channel is making progress with our lineup for an upcoming gig! It's a totally new experience for Kusabi and me so we're pretty excited!

Here's what we've come up so far. We're huge Zelda fans so this is a really obvious choice. Check it out!

Soundcloud: Legend of Zelda Main Theme (Drumstep Mix)

I'm excited to do this live. We're arranging another remix this week. It's a medley of sorts, and it's from a famous RPG series. Can you guys guess what it is?

Wow, I survived a whole week without Facebook. I wonder if I can still keep doing this.

The 30-Day No Facebook Challenge: Day 5

It's so unbearably hot, I think I took a bath four times today. So excited to see the water bill this month. :/ But this heat has given me another motivation to go to work everyday (apart from the money, and my daily dose of Nescafe Iced Coffee).

Kusabi's birthday is coming up in four days and I still don't know what to give him. I suck at this.

I did nothing but play Biz Builder Delux this morning. How productive. But I'd still say it's less stressful than scrolling on Facebook the whole day.

The 30-day No Facebook Challenge: Day 4

It kinda feels like I'm still posting on Facebook, but in non-coherent blog form. Oh well.




I cooked carbonara on my own, from scratch! I didn't use ready-made sauce this time so I'm pretty proud of myself. I used margarine instead of butter though (because I can't find butter anywhere near our place)

I'm active on Viber guys! So if you know my number, let's spam each other with stickers! :3

I'm always online on Skype too, so you can add me up there. Username is jazz_psyche

The 30-Day No Facebook Challenge: Day 3

This challenge is really hard during rest days. Ugh. But the positive effects are slowly creeping in.

Since I rely on my FB feed for news,(I'll be all like, "Uy nabasa mo ba sa Facebook?") I have totally no idea what's going on out there anymore. That's a good thing I guess? Because the last thing I need right now is to dwell on trivial trending stuff. If there's anything trending right now, I would probably not know about it. And I don't really care, haha.

I spent my whole Saturday playing Valkyrie Profile on emulator and sleeping. I slept for 12 hours, wtf. It didn't feel good, and I wasted half of my rest day already. Oh well.

Some people added me on Google Plus! Hey guys! *waves* I'm not active on G+ either, but blogspot is automatically crossposting all blog posts.

It's Kusabi's birthday next Friday! At least I get to celebrate something without posting it on Facebook. High five yo.

PS: I'm still mindlessly scrolling through my Instagram. Don't judge, I'm working on it. :))

The 30-Day No Facebook Challenge: Day 2

The whole day, whenever I thought or heard of something witty, I said to myself, "I'm going to post this on FB later... Oh."

Damn. I thought this was easy.

On the plus side, I went to bed early yesterday, so that must be something positive, yeah? I still stared mindlessly at my phone scrolling through Instagram instead though. That's not cheating, right? I mean, it's technically still not Facebook. Bwahaha.

A few people messaged Kusabi asking me where I am already. And my mom even called us up asking what's going on. Guys, I'm perfectly fine. This is called soul searching. I think. Haha.

On another negative note, our new band Midnight Channel just uploaded our first cover, but since I don't have Facebook (and Kusabi only has 251 friends, lame hahahah) it's kinda hard to promote. So I gotta say, I'm lacking social media power (if I even have that) at the moment. Kusabi left his Facebook page open so I can post the video and come up with a description for it. That's the only thing I did on Facebook, I swear. :))

...Okay, I scrolled a bit, out of habit, but I stopped myself before I went any further. Pat on the back, y'all!

Speaking of our video, Imma post it right here for you guys! According to my page view counts, some people are still viewing my blog, so yey. Now watch this because we are awesome ohohoho.

That's it for today! It's my rest day so let's see if I can still keep this craziness up. 

Off to play Valkyrie Profile on emulator yippeeeeeee!

The 30-day No Facebook Challenge: Day 1

For the first time ever, I have deactivated my Facebook account.

It was originally done for a different purpose, but I have decided to take a break from Facebook for a while. I have realized that I have wasted countless hours on it, and it has consumed almost my entire social life. I have valuable friendships to keep and I don't need Facebook to maintain that relationship. (and as I have always pointed out, Facebook is an evil place.)

I will be blogging everything here, and will come back after 30 days. I will still be active on Instagram, Skype and Viber (once I figure out how to use that damn thing) so you can contact me there.

So. Here goes nothing.

The 30-day No Facebook Challenge: Day 1

There isn't much to report right now since it's just starting. I had an argument with two of my best friends (which started this whole craziness in the first place) and I sent both of them text messages saying how sorry I am and have acknowledged that I am at fault, which they have accepted and replied to. I hope when I come back after 30 days, I won't start these silly arguments again.

I will miss you, beautiful girlies.*kisses both of you*

I wasnt in the best of moods today, so someone decided to cheer me up. 

When I got home, I saw this: It's a list of all the things he has done today while I was at work. 

I thought it was just an ordinary love note, but then I read the last part of the letter. 

"Bonus: Gusto mo ngumiti? Ako naman ang may ipapagawa sayo. Let's play a little game. Sundan mo lang yung instructions ko. Wag ka na tamarin! Saglit lang to! (Tamad! de Lacy ka din talaga) Bago pa ako bumalik, tapos na ikaw dito."

Yeah, I'm lazy, so the thought of running around trying to check out the clues, lol. I'm kidding.

"Clue 01: Nasa pink na box na pinagpapatungan ng laptop. Right drawer". Oh, that was easy.

"O di ba andali lang? Parang mahalin ka. Para sakin, sobrang dali gawin nun. Na late lang talaga ako ng dating eh. Pero para sakin, kasing dali ng pagkakita mo dito sa papel na ito yung mahalin ka. Dun lang ba natatapos yun? Hindi. Meron pa. Kaya may second clue pa.

Clue 2: Sa mga pinggan/hugasin?"

I thought the challenge was for me to do the dishes, haha, but I remembered he already did that. So I looked for the second clue. (Our apartment isn't really that big so..)

"Clue 2 Bakit ito? Bakit dito? Kasi malinis ngayon dito. Parang intensyon ko sayo. (Hindi to pilit ah. Totoo to). Nung nagpropose ako sayo, higit pa ako sa seryoso nun kaya YOLO. Wala akong ibang gusto kundi ikaw, maging masaya ka, at mahalin ka ng walang palabok. 

[at this point I looked around for palabok but there was none. lol]"

"Clue 3: I always thank you for this gift. lol. Nasa ilalim nung bagay na yun."

Lol right, that was also really easy to figure out. He hasn't stopped thanking me since I bought him that Razer Blackwidow Chroma as a Christmas/Valentines gift. He has always wanted that keyboard and I've seen him gasp in awe whenever he watched the demos. Ahh, the goofy smile on his face the whole time, it was worth it. 

"Clue 3: This Chroma. I can't thank you enough for this, but Im even more thankful for being a part, a significant part of your life. I will always be thankful to you.

This hunt and seek game's almost done. You're down to the last clue and to where I'm dreaming of being with you."

Last clue: The undying flower and within a book, the title describes my dream with you.

He gave me two roses on Valentines Day: One was real and one was plastic. I kept the real one inside one of my books. I didn't really look at the book, it was random. 

Although the book was about a woman trying to sabotage her little sister's honeymoon because she doesn't approve, haha. But that's irrelevant.

Last Clue: Finally, youre back in this position. Daming dinaanan no? Pero dito din pala. Parang tayo, kung ano ano pa dinaanan. Ang mahalaga, nandito na tayo. I gave you this flower.You may ask, "This again?" Kasi parang pagmamahal ko yan sayo. Undying, unyielding, intact and will never, ever change. I love you Jesse Anne/Jazz/Kairee. I ask you again, marry me and let's go to our Wedding Night.

=^_^= B'awwww.

I don't really need to point out that no one has ever done this much effort to make me smile. Sigh. Nakakainis ka talaga. Hue! I love you! 

I'm Engaged!

If you've asked me a year ago if I ever wanted to get married, I would have probably laughed at you and changed the subject. To be honest, the thought of walking down the aisle has never crossed my mind. I didn't think of myself as wife material. I mean, come on, I'm allergic to dishwashing liquid and detergent, and that fact alone merits me a zero on the "Potential Wifey" scale. I can't cook. I don't do household chores. I'm lazy. So for the sake of the unlucky guy I will be with, getting married wasn't really on my agenda.

Until I met this guy.

So when he proposed to me last Saturday with a ring and a Monster Hunter Pre-order receipt from Datablitz (lol), in front of a huge crowd, I didn't even hesitate. I said yes. (Well, technically, as my friend Ivy pointed out, I said "Ohmygod, Monster Hunter preorder!" instead of an audible yes, but yeah)

(c) Jo Baluyot

Although some would probably think that it's too early for me to say this, I can see myself spending the rest of my life with him. I've made a lot of stupid mistakes in my life. But this time, I feel like I'm making one of the best decisions ever.

I think I've never been so happy in my life. I'm not even exaggerating. I'm still walking around with a huge goofy smile on my face. People in the office said I looked happier. And it's true. I am a whole lot happier.

So yes, I will marry you. And I can't wait to be lazy with you. :D

Oh my god, I'm getting married next year. WTF. :))

Here's the video if you wanna watch it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=37UKOrvYia0

P.S. My mom wants to have a word with you though, hala ka. Hahaha.

Handling Changes

I'm scared to death of changes.
I stayed in the same company for eight years for that reason. I am terrified to start all over again. I don't like going out of my comfort zone, that's why I'm stuck doing the same things over and over again.

A friend sent me this message recently:

Well, there are things worth leaving even if it's already familiar

I thought about it for a while, and I realized that she's right. And this applies to all aspects of life: work, relationships, old habits.
Change is inevitable, and we have to be prepared to dive head first into that. It shouldn't be scary, it's down to how you handle it and adjust to it.

A new life is waiting for me! /o/ I can't wait for March. In the meantime, hopefully I'll survive February in one piece.

================================

Sorry if I haven't updated in a while! Will post a super late blog post about Otaku Expo in a bit! (If I'm not lazy)

Sometimes I just want to disappear; Run away from all the stress and leave everything behind. I want to bleed for a few minutes and suffer from excruciating pain. And then, afterwards, a calming feeling will overcome me. Finally I'll be in peace.

People think it's selfish to commit suicide, but when it does happen, they mourn for a few days, and eventually, they will go on with their lives. The world won't be better off without you, but it wouldn't be worse off either. You can just disappear, and no matter how much these people love you, at the end of the day, they dont care if you stay or not. They will accept your loss, and eventually forget about you.

Vacation's Over

And just like that, my vacation is done. I'll be dragging myself to work again on Friday. I really want to say that I'm looking forwa--- no, I'm not. I'm dreading it. Hahah.

So what did I do for the past two weeks?

Nothing.

Like, literally, all I did was to sleep, wake up at 8pm, eat, surf the net, and then sleep again in the morning. I didn't go out at all (well, that's because I just spent all my money before the New Year, so I was penniless for 14 days, hahaha huhuhu). My mom joked that I was here for two weeks but they just saw me for two hours every day.  (Total exaggeration, by the way)

I'm going back to Quezon City in a few hours. Sigh. I will miss my family. I wish I could stay here forever and work somewhere near here. On the other hand, I'm happy because I'm finally coming home to Kusabi and Miyu and Mayu and Mako!

So, there ya go. Vacation's over! Hooray. *crawls and cries in a corner*

My Coffee Buddy

Less that 24 hours since you left but here I am terribly missing you.

I miss how we'd make ourselves cups of coffee and just sit down and just talk about anything, even the silliest of things. We both like coffee, and that's one of the things I love about you.

And then while in mid sentence I'd suddenly kiss you, leaving you a bit flustered, forgetting your words for a few seconds. Then we'd remember about our coffee.

Crap, it's already cold. We'd then think, "How long have we been talking?"

I'm now taking a sip of my coffee, which has turned cold as well. Ah. Probably because I've been thinking of you so much that I forgot about it too.

====================================================

My vacation is almost over. Ugh, it's over toooo soon. I'm going back to work on Friday. I will try not to remem--- I mean, forget all my system passwords. LOL.

Getting Lost With You

I'm dating a guy who, like me, has no sense of direction.

Somehow, I find that really adorable.

We could travel far places together and get lost within ten minutes of arriving.

Too proud to ask other people for directions, we'd float around for hours, laughing at our predicament.

We'd hold hands and walk aimlessly, talking about random things just to pass the time.

Then we'd stop walking, and finally, we'd get lost in each other's eyes.

Eventually, we'd give in to our egos and finally ask for directions. For some people, this would be a waste of time. But for us, it's worth it, as long as I'm with you.

And I'm sure, the next day, we wouldn't mind getting lost again.

"Everybody come closer to the stage and let's rock!" Our vocalist growled, motioning at the crowd. Everyone moved closer, cheering them on. I didn't have any part in the last song, so I stepped down the stage and watched with the rest of the crowd.

I watched in awe as the started to play, and tears started to fall down my cheeks. I wiped them away, as I just cried at the studio a few hours ago.

I was crying because we have come so far. People finally recognize us. Some people would attend conventions just to see us perform. And we never failed to deliver. These guys have worked hard for it. And, of course, they deserve to be recognized.

Then I realized. They can move forward and achieve even bigger things.

Even without me.

I'm not sure if people are even reading my blog, so I think I can say this.  I feel like they don't need me in the band anymore. They can still go on, with or without me.

I think this has something to do with what happened recently, I'm not quite sure, but I don't feel as excited for a gig anymore, compared to before. I don't feel as motivated to go onstage with them. They can go on without me.

I just don't feel like it's still worth it.

Call me a quitter or whatever, but when the time comes, I'm going to say goodbye to asterysk*.  I know they can still achieve great things. And I will still be here to support them. asterysk* is my baby, and will always be.

I have to admit, I just started watching your Youtube videos recently. I know you've been posting these videos before, but I didn't pay attention to them. (Even though you wanted me to watch them) :P

Did I ever tell you how awesome you are?

(I still think Kurikinton Fox is better tho, haha. I love you anyway <3 )

Cosplay Progress Meme

Because Karin asked me to make one XD

Left pic is my Mikuru Asahina cosplay from 2009. It wasn't my first cosplay, though, I just can't find pictures of my other cosplays before that.

All other pics are from last year. Notice the huge gap in between?

I haven't really taken cosplay seriously until recently. But even then I wanted to cosplay characters that can really relate to. I wanted to cosplay Elizabeth ever since Persona 3 came out, but then again my biggest enemy is my lack of self esteem. But cosplay is now one of my motivations, one of the reasons why my confidence grew.

I didn't really know how to apply makeup then (I still don't, haha) but I've learned that research is the key to good cosplay. I played the games, searched for poses online, and looked for makeup tutorials on Youtube.
Enjoying yourself in cosplay is one thing, but portraying the character accurately is another.

I've got a few cosplans lined up this year, mostly Nintendo characters.

20 Random Things About Me

I've been racking my brains for something intelligent to write about (to no avail). So for now, I decided to come up with a list of random things about me. If you already know most of the things listed here, well, congratulations! Here goes nothing.

1. I have a morbid fear of clowns. This deserves a separate blog post entirely, so I'd write about that in more detail soon.
2. I have no sense of direction. I got lost in SM North once.
3. I'm left handed.
4. I hate waiting. I don't like queuing for anything for more than 30 mins. So if I waited for you for more than that, that means you're special to me. I'm probably slapping your face in my head though but don't worry about it. 
5. I like dark chocolate. The more bitter the better.
6. I eat ketchup straight from the packet.
7. I like anything cheese flavored. Actually, I like cheese. 
8. I don't like spicy food. I remember this one time when my team ordered a bucket of KFC spicy chicken. I was so sad that day, haha.
9. I cry. A lot. Sometimes for no reason at all.
10. I have a very short fuse. I tend to get annoyed easily. I'm trying to control myself recently though. I think I'm doing a pretty good job at it.
11. I have a very short attention span. So I apologize in advance if I tend to space out when people are talking to me. 
12. I'm accident prone. When I was in high school, I skipped CAT for the first few weeks. And when I finally gave in and attended, I fell six feet from a rope and sprained my ankle.
13. I'm forgetful. I keep forgetting where I put my stuff most of the time, including my glasses (I wonder where my glases are right now? XD)
14. I like, no, love coffee. I'm still puzzled as to why some people don't like coffee. It's one of the best things ever. 
15. I easily get excited over simple things, like finding out about release dates for a game I want or going on a trip with friends.
16. Speaking of games, I usually don't finish games, probably because I don't want the game to end so soon. So I grind until I get bored and eventually not finish the game at all anyway.
17. I am my biggest critic. I get frustrated when I listen to my vocal recordings because I'm always never satisfied with them. 
18. I'm a romantic at heart. As cheesy as it may sound, I like showing people how much I care about them. This is why I get hurt a lot of times.
19. I can't cook. But I'm trying to learn!
20. I am very shy. No, really. I don't talk to people in real life unless they talk to me first. I'm scared that I might say stupid things so I don't talk at all if that's possible. 

The Last Dance: A Short Story

"Are we there yet?" A male voice demanded.

"Just a little more!" the girl said.

"Mayu, look, I really don't have time for this!" He said impatiently. "Will you please let me go back to the dorm so that I could study in peace?"

"Why are you being such a nerd, Kai?" Mayu whined. "Alright! We're here!"

Kai blinked. "Mayu, this is the auditorium." he said in a blunt tone.

Mayu nodded. "That's right!"

"Why are we here?"

Mayu bounced up the auditorium stage. "I've always wanted to perform on this stage but I never got the chance..." Mayu said in a sad voice. Her eyes suddenly widened. "Hey, do you remember when we were kids? Your mom used to teach us how to dance."

Kai sat at the edge of the stage. "Yeah, she used to be a dance instructor." He chuckled. "I never got that talent from her. She's always so graceful."

Mayu sat beside Kai. "I've always wanted to be like your mom." She squinted her eyes at the bright stage lights.

"You're still not answering my question," Kai said. "Why did you bring me here?"

"The doctor said.. I won't live long... I want ... to ask you something before I die..." Mayu whispered.

"Mayu... Don't say that.. You're not going to die..." Kai pleaded.

"What does it feel like... to be loved?" Mayu asked, ignoring Kai's stare. "I mean, to be romantically involved with someone...?"

Kai sighed. "You will still feel that... You still have plenty of..."

"I'm dying, Kai! Don't you understand that?" Mayu burst out, tears falling from her eyes. "I don't have much time left... That's why.. I want to know... how to be loved..."


Kai did not say anything for a few seconds. He hates it when someone cries in front of him. It makes him feel helpless. He stood up and extended his hand towards Mayu. Mayu looked at him, puzzled. "You're not going to tell me to go home right?" She asked tentatively.

Kai gently smiled. "I'm not too late, am I?"

"Too late for what?"

"Take my hand."

Mayu held Kai's hand. Kai helped Mayu stand up and led her to the center of the stage. Mayu's heartbeat elevated as Kai put his left hand on her waist and held her hand with the other. They started to sway without music, their bodies close to each other.

Mayu smiled as she inhaled Kai's sweet scent. "I.. wasn't expecting you to do this, Kai..."

"What were you expecting?" Kai whispered while gently blowing Mayu's hair away from her face.

"I was expecting you to tell me about that girl you were planning to court..."

"Why?"

"I don't know... I guess I just want to know before I go..."

Kai grinned. "Okay, if you really want me to tell you about her... She is sweet, caring, very active and animated.. and.. well..."

"Well.. what?"

"...she broke my heart..."

"She did?" Mayu asked. "How?"

"She told me.. that she was dying... before I got the chance to tell her how I really feel about her... "

Silence filled the auditorium as they continued to dance. Tears flowed incessantly from Mayu's eyes. "I.. really don't know what to say..."

"I do..." Kai replied. He tightened his grip on Mayu's hand. "I love you."

Mayu leaned her head against Kai's chest. "Thank you, Kai...I'm sorry..." She closed her eyes and breathed deeply.

For the first and last time in her life, she felt loved.

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I wrote this almost eight(!!) years ago. Since I'm still suffering from long term writer's block (I made that up), and I'm living up to my reputation as a lazy princess, I decided to repost some of my old stories. 

Here's the original post on Tabulas: http://kairee.tabulas.co/2007/06/01/@1430096/

Dreamsicle: A Start of A Beautiful Friendship

 

A few years ago, I'm this friendless, antisocial little kid. I have hundreds of acquaintances but I haven't considered anyone as a close friend.  And sad as it may sound, I was okay with being alone.

Until I met Ivy and Icel. 

Dreamsicle at Toycon 2013

We formed a singing group, Dreamsicle, in August 2012. At first, I felt like a bit out of place. They've been friends since forever, so I wasn't sure if I'd fit in.

A few months later though, I found myself really enjoying their company. I don't really like going out, except to go to work or attend gigs and practices. But I looked forward to our practices, and I even want to see them outside of gigs and practices, just because.

Suddenly, I didn't feel so alone anymore. 

Cultural Festival with asterysk* and Shinkan

Last year has been an emotional rollercoaster for me. And throughout the entire ride, they were both there for me. We may not see each other that often due to our jobs and conflicting schedules, but they were there when I truly needed them. We went beyond talking about cosplay, anime, and song lineups. We talked about our lives, our jobs, our problems, and tried to cheer each other up whenever there's a chance. 

They were an integral part of the life-changing decisions I've made last year. And when I was about to fall down, they were there to catch me and assure me that everything will be okay.

This year, I will be focusing more on my girls. Here's to more cosplays, more gigs, more ramen trips, and more beautiful music together. I love you both!

Tap Titans: Ridiculously Addictive

I was going through the Play Store this morning looking for a new game to play. I stopped playing mobile games since Fantasy Life came out, and I was looking for something to pass the time while waiting for my 3DS to charge.

I found Tap Titans on my list of suggested games and tried it out.

It was one of the best/worst decisions of my life.


Tap Titans is a new android game by Game Hive, the same company who released Beat the Boss.

It's really simple to play. You just tap the monsters when the appear on the screen to attack them until they run out of HP.

Your main character is upgradeable, and can level up using the money you get from killing the monsters. Skills are also available, and you can use them for really tough bosses.

You can also buy minions to fight for you when youre not playing the game. So when you come back, yoi can claim the money they've earned while you're away.


But the thing is, you really wouldn't want to put this game down. It's highly addictive. I've personally played it for two hours straight, my fingers felt like they have muscles already.

You can download Tap Titans here.Android | IOS

First Month

When you consider the length of time that we actually knew each other, one month is insignificant. But it's been a month since I first held your hand. A month since I first stared into your eyes and kissed you.

After all these days, it still feels unreal sometimes.

I learned to do a lot of things I don't usually do. I'm now smiling with my teeth showing in some of my pictures because you said my smile is beautiful. I started appreciating myself because you appreciate me, and you inspired me to start writing again.

 I, in turn, taught you how to cook pancit canton properly, (lol) and showed you how a gentleman should cross the street when he's with a girl (the guy should always be on the side of incoming traffic). 

We still have a lot to learn from each other and about each other, and I'm looking forward to make a lot more memories with you. (If you do manage to teach me how to play a guitar, which is a major challenge because of my limited attention span, then you're awesome :D)

I keep falling in love with you everyday. I love the way you stare at me through your long eyelashes. I love how your hair falls softly around your face (It sounds like I'm describing a girl, haha, jk.) i love the way you squeeze my arms, as if to reassure me that you are there beside me and you will never let go. There are a hundred things I love about you, but I'll save that for a later blog post. :p

Im going home on Saturday so we won't be seeing each other for two weeks. I know you're already dreading it. We can still talk on facebook and send text messages but I know it wouldn't feel the same. Man, wala pa nga pero miss na kita.

Happy first month. I love you.

PS: Put, one month pa lang yan, ano pa kaya kung mas matagal pa, baka nobela na tong tinatype ko. Haha.